Monday, March 19, 2012

From Where I Sit: I Don't Want Your Pity Party!

Something has been eating at me recently, and until I read this post on my good friend Steven Gantt's blog, did it hit me as to what it was.

Steven was talking about obstacles he faced in his life and then went on to say, "Stop your pity party, I’m alive so it’s okay."

With a huge smile on my face, I thought, yes, that is what it is. I don't want your pity party either!

Having lived my entire life with my physical disability I know nothing different. This is how my life has always been, and to tell you the truth, I have completely rocked it!

Every so often I will encounter a person that I can tell simply feels sorry for me. . .and it DRIVES ME CRAZY! First of all, I don't feel sorry for me, so you shouldn't either.

This is how I look at life. . .there is a purpose for me being in this chair. It may not be abundantly clear as to why I am, but there is a purpose. Maybe it is so I can be the strength for others in my similar situation who need a little inspiration. Maybe it is so I can help to break the stereotypes of those with disabilities because I refuse to be labeled. Maybe it is so when someone is feeling defeated (disabled or not) they can look at me and say, "Wow, if she can do it, so can I." Or maybe it is none of those things. Maybe it is because God knew that despite all the challenges I would face, He had provided me with enough spirit that I could handle this life.

I don't look at my life as a burden; I look at it as a blessing, challenges and all. I love that I have been able to break down barriers and overcome obstacles and I look forward to whatever life brings me in the future, and sharing all the excitement with all of you!

15 comments:

  1. I understand. Often when someone knows that I had cancer, I hear the pity in their voice, also. I feel that I survived. When I am with you, I totally forget you can't walk. Your chair is invisible to me. All I see is a vibrant, beautiful young woman that won't let anything stand in her way. Watch out world! Here we come!!Your loving Aunt

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    1. I so love you!!! I know that I have this outlook because of my family, because all of you never let me feel sorry for myself. You never held me back or discouraged me. Instead you lifted me up, encouraging me that anything is possible. . .and it is.

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  2. It is easy to fall into a pity party. I have done it with my liver disease, and I am sure that you have had your own experience with it. But it doesn't do any good. It is much easier to have a positive outlook than a negative one, and it makes life more fun. There is no reason to wallow in self-despair.

    http://www.glamkittenslitterbox.com/
    Twitter: @GlamKitten88

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    1. A good friend said to me once when we were talking about this topic that he tells ppl, "Don't wallow in self pity. Swish your feet and get out!"

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  3. I loved ur blog... The layout is so beautiful.
    xx Raquel*
    *
    www.lemurrose.net

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    1. Thank you so much! I hope you will visit me again :)

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  4. This helps me, too! I may not seem very affected by my recent "change" in physiology but it did kind of 'hit' me yesterday... but what was the use in sitting there and letting it slap me?
    "What would Jamie do if she knew I was thinking this stuff?"
    I thought you'd say this exact thing. Thank youuuuu!

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    1. Wow Hillary. You made my day with your "What would Jamie do if. . ." You are too adorable!!!

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  6. I'm really affected by your story above..
    It is okay if we have disability in our life as people in the world are not perfect =). Even me, I also have a big birth mark on my face :) and before I used to feel not confident, but when I think again, what's the use of being not confident. It just waste my time and making me stressed, so just use it by thinking positive =). We should be thankful for everything like we still have someone to love us and many amazing things happen in the world =) Just be grateful to what God has given us, believe me what God has given is the right choice, as there is something or purpose behind (can be a miracle or luck) that we do not know as long as we keep on trying to our best effort.
    Keep up the spirit =) You go girl....

    Follow my blog at
    www.arikayasmine.blogpot.com

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    1. You are so right! There is a purpose for everything and we need to embrace what we have been given!

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  7. Beautiful post, beautiful mentality.

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    1. Thank you SO MUCH! Hope you will stop by again soon! XOXO

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  8. When people say that bad things happening is some kind of blessing in disguise from God, I think of that scene in As Good As It Gets when Jack Nicholson tells that maid "sell crazy somewhere else. Were all stocked up here." Seriously, if God put me in a wheelchair, I'd be pissed. I'd go to the dark side. There is nothing redeeming about not the ability to walk. I know it's different for you because you never known what it like to have use of your legs. In my opinion, you being in a wheelchair serves no purpose. You got dealt some shitty cards and it isn't fair. But I commend you for making the most of it. I would be too pissed to see it that way.

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    1. I certainly appreciate your response and understand where you are coming from. I know you are looking at the situation from someone who does walk. Believe me, I would LOVE to walk, but whether I have walked or not in my past, I will always look at my life and situation as a blessing. What purpose would it serve for me to complain and sulk? I have done extraordinary things even being in a wheelchair (Like be in a major motion picture). It hasn't stopped me to this point and it won't stop me in the future. No matter what you deal with in life, your outcome is what you make of it and having a positive attitude can only make things better.

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